Shared Hope

Dawning hours break and a tired voice calls out in the hallway, “Mommy? I had a dream…”  and the tired body of my little boy comes crawling up into my bed as I grab my phone and begin asking him questions and jotting it down.

There was a train on the nightstand that was a toy but he thought it was a real train. It was moving with a red light on it. The red light made him afraid. The train came out of the books on the table. There were princess carriages going down the books. Jeremiah says the train scared him and he pushed it off the dresser and it broke. It wasn’t his train. Says he was on the ground sitting and holding his knees. There was a big crack on the ground to his right side. I was sitting on the left side of him and I was petting him and he thought I was someone else like a stranger.

I pondered this dream in my mommy heart through the morning and recognized some symbols from my own dreams. The train represents the new daddy my children asked the Lord for on July 4th of 2016.

Now, I’m following along with my own dreams, I know where I am at in the state of things and I’m praying into this daily so I’m not worried- despite what things look like in the natural…and let me tell you…it’s a little grim. But I’ve been expecting this point in time…for a year and almost 3 months and I’m excited. Now don’t get me wrong, the Lord warned me that this was going to hurt, but it didn’t define me…and hurt it did. Briefly. Actually as it was happening I had this brief deer-in-headlights moment where I felt like an atom bomb was dropped on my heart but as things progressed and I was messaging a friend through it all, I realized that I had been warned, multiple times…and the time had arrived. I had done what the Lord asked me to do, I had been obedient…but the sting of rejection…still stings whether you’re expecting it or not.  But bless the Lord…he told me just the other day, “Lovely boy thy Shepherd found” and I knew who He was talking about.

Anyway…

So I’m tra-la-la’ing along in my head and heart and somehow stupidly have forgotten that my children don’t hear God like I do, yet. Jeremiah is getting there. He will do great things, I’m certain. But I began to poke through the symbols of his dream, allowing God to insert His thoughts and I realized that I had dropped the ball.

He is waiting too. So is my daughter. Granted they have a dad and another mom that they love close by, but their mommy is missing hers. They know their new daddy has been promised. So in the car on the way to an appointment this morning I asked Jeremiah if he was afraid if his new daddy wasn’t going to like him. He said no, but he was afraid that he was never going to come and his head bowed down and his face sunk. “When is he going to come?”

I don’t know baby boy…soon. It’s all I’ve got…and I’ve been saying it for 8 months (oh…insert epiphany here…).

After talking with him and sitting down again with it, I realized that Jeremiah’s dream was reiterating what he told me in the car. He didn’t believe that train was coming, the red light was his fear that it had been stopped and wasn’t coming. The princess carriages were his perception of how he saw me and how he was anticipating things, like a prince and princess coming together. But the prince wasn’t there and it made him upset so he hit the train and it broke feeling like it was never going to come…this train wasn’t his…he must have been mistaken. He held his knees, upset and in mourning over what he thought would come quickly, a giant crack on the ground on his right, where his new daddy should be and me as a stranger because he feels like he has been lied to. The crack represents barren ground…But the Lord says:

Isaiah 54:1

“Shout for joy, O barren one, you who have borne no child; Break forth into joyful shouting and cry aloud, you who have not travailed; For the sons of the desolate one will be more numerous Than the sons of the married woman,” says the LORD.

And repeated by the Apostle Paul in Galatians 4:27

I thought I bore this burden alone (with the help of a few friends). I thought I was protecting them from the wait, but really all I gave them was hope deferred. I need to gather them in, allow them to step into God’s labor and delivery room with me and be a part of birthing this promise. They too need to see God moving in their lives, this is as much a part of their lives as it is mine.

Lord, I can’t help but sing
Faithful you are
All your promises are yes and amen

 

~Amanda

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Evidence

Some days I wonder, “Lord, what fruit do I have?” This morning was one of those such mornings. I sat there getting ready for work, thinking about a dream I had about 4-5 months ago, wondering what this fruit looked like that the Lord said I had.

This morning, He was kind enough to show me.

I’m a pay it forward sort of person. It’s something I like to do rather than give money to an institution. I like to be the church and so there’s a couple Moxie Java places that I do this at…every Tuesday and on the days that I desperately need coffee…like today. I was asking the Lord to show me what He saw vs what I saw…because His vision of us is always vastly different than our vision of us.

So I pull into the drive through behind this giant red truck and I’m craning my neck out the window, ordering my coffee and I lean back in and close my eyes and sing. The truck pulls away and I pull forward and the girl (who knows me) looks at me and says “Oh YAY! I’m so glad it’s you!!! The truck in front of you just paid for your coffee! And look there’s no one behind you for you to pay for!”

Folks…this stuff never happens to me. I’m not the lucky person who gets free stuff. I never win anything and that’s okay. I sat and marveled for a moment and she looked at my car and said…this is not the car you are usually in. Did you get a new car!! And so I explained my car. My ex husband has the same car…they match. I didn’t choose that car it was chosen for me and while I had an amazing payment and a super low interest rate…his name was still on all of it. I went into my history a little…and she went into hers. Common ground we found there and yet she said to me…

“I just have to say, that you are amazing. You clearly have not let life squash who you are and make you bitter. You overcame. That’s awesome.”

I refrained from crying and said thank you, gave her a high five and went on my way.

In that moment, I marveled at the mercy of the Lord. Guys…I wish I could impress upon your heart just how much He TRULY loves you. Ladies, you are the most beautiful thing He has set His eyes on, Gentlemen, you make His eyes sparkle with how proud of you He is, seeing you grow to be more like Him. Even if you doubt yourself. Even if you have come to the end of you and there’s nothing you can do, you’ve run out of resources, you’ve run out of ideas and actions and everything feels like it’s a mess and falling apart is the moment when God says YES! Finally! Let me handle this for you, I see that you cannot do it on your own and I want to bless your life on MY STRENGTH and steer you in the direction of MY WILL. Will you surrender your striving to make things better? To smooth things over? Will you let go of your perfectionism? Your ideals? Come to ME YOU WHO ARE WEARY…and I will give you rest.

Are you weary? Let Him carry you to the place of rest, where striving ceases and comfort surrounds and abounds. He can do it for you. You just have to let Him.

I’ve realized lately that life feels overwhelming. I can’t seem to get a handle on things that I can usually handle and it’s all minor stuff…but it began to pile up on my heart and didn’t realize it…That is until yesterday when I began getting ready for work and a Simple Partial Seizure came like a sickening wave over me. Usually when I get one, typically I know at least 2 more will follow throughout the day. They leave me tired, weak and not fully remembering the days events in detail…like trying to remember what you did on any random day last week…it feels distant and disconnected. So as I stood at my bathroom sink brushing my teeth, another wave came over me. Halo in affect, hearing muffled, stomach clenched and the action of repeatedly swallowing, though nothing is there. At least my left arm doesn’t lock up like it used to. They happen once a year typically, during high stress times in my life. It wasn’t until later that evening after I read an article my friend sent me that I, like Moses and Elijah before me, had run out of myself. Moses was 40 years old before he reached this point in his life where he was at the end of his own capabilities. That’s when God stepped in. Moses was a Prince! He was fully capable! And he had come to a point where he said to God…who am I? I can’t even talk right!  He presented his faults to God and God was like…dude…I don’t care, that makes you PERFECT for what I want to do. Emptied of self so you can’t muck up what I want to do.

I feel pretty emptied. I know, based on my dreams that the husband God has for me is within my line of sight. Not somewhere over the rainbow, but the time is here and now and any day He will bring us together and I’m like AAAAAAAHHHHHHHH! Yes Lord I’m ready and I want it! But…I’m not functioning properly right now, will he want me? Things I used to be able to do, I can’t seem to do. Surviving on stress and 6 hours of sleep I can’t do…It’s like it’s all catching up and I need 9+ hours and even then getting up in the morning is a struggle. I make it…I do it, but the way I feel about the finesse in which I accomplish these things feels a little deflated.

Now, of course he will want me. He’s been waiting a long time for me and he’s not going to pass up or walk away from what God has deemed His best for him… do I feel like God’s best…yeah…hahah, but does he feel like God’s best? Do we ever feel like God’s best? In 2 Corinthians 5:7 we are called to walk by faith and not by sight and so most likely both of us feel the same (I kinda have some insider information in this area…) about ourselves. But again, the way God sees us is so different from the way we see us. We list off our insecurities and think that just because we feel this way about ourselves it makes us unqualified and other people also feel this way about these same things on us and we take on the thought that everyone thinks we are unqualified. But the truth is, they are too busy being concerned about their own insecurities to notice yours. And the very things that you feel make you unqualified may be the very things that they love most about you. We have to lighten up on ourselves and attempt to see us the way God sees us. We have to lay these things down before the throne so we can be emptied and take on His vision for us. My struggles do not make me unqualified. It’s in my weakness that the Lord can move mountains, it’s in my weakness that the Lord finds me beautifully qualified. And yet we are so quick to put ourselves down. We can’t speak ill of the Lord’s anointed…and yes, that’s you. And me. And him.

We have to look in the mirror and say I am beautiful and loved and I can do all things through Christ…not through Amanda. Clearly not through Amanda. And what’s funny…that’s where the fruit is. God does the thing through us…and give us the reward. Isn’t that crazy?

So no more doubting yourself. Stop doubting who you are and let His love flow into your heart because you are His amazing creation and He loves you to the moon and back.

~Amanda

PS…Since writing this post, I have been bought lunch today…and someone bought me two pink roses as well. ❤

Burning Man

Lately I have been struggling with my emotions. I’ve stepped into a new level of the anointing the Lord has placed on me and my discernment has definitely increased which has caused me to realize…

The emotions I’m feeling are not mine. They are coming from the people that I’m interceding for.

John 11 discusses the death of Lazarus. It’s such an emotional chapter because it’s very clear that Jesus had a deep love for Lazarus, Mary and Martha.  In verse 14, Jesus tells his disciples plainly that Lazarus is dead and yet he speaks in confidence that he is just sleeping and they will be glad that he (Jesus) wasn’t there to make him well.

John 11:32-32

When Mary reached the place where Jesus was and saw him, she fell at his feet and said, “Lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died.”

33 When Jesus saw her weeping, and the Jews who had come along with her also weeping, he was deeply moved in spirit and troubled. 34 “Where have you laid him?” he asked.

“Come and see, Lord,” they replied.

Romans 12:15
Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn.


Jesus had no reason to be weeping over Lazarus. He LOVED Lazarus yes, but he KNEW that Lazarus was not gone, that he would live again. Then why did he cry? Because he was so connected to and probably interceding for Mary and Martha, he could feel the sorrow that the two women (and his disciples) felt over the loss of such a friend and brother. Jesus could sense their emotions and it affected him.

I had a dream the other night where the Lord showed me this in action. I was confused before this because I was good one day, the next day I felt lonely, the next day bitter and upset with God, the next day I was good. But the Lord has showed me how to control those emotions so they don’t drive me or my day…but they are still there and I puzzled and asked why I was suddenly feeling unbalanced.

So in this dream was me and my future husband.  He frequented a store where the clerk had an attitude. The room was mint green…an herb meaning bitter. He grabbed a few things from this store and I went into this store to  only because he was going there. I stood in line behind him and asked the clerk when it was my turn, “Do you know if he likes me?” and she said “Girl, he don’t like anyone,” and he walked out of the store as if he was the only person there. I was discouraged because I felt so invisible, a reflection of how he felt as well. I began working in a store that had a window across from this green shop so I could watch him, but in the dream I never went back to the store. There were negative voices in this place where I was, and only one voice that was filled with love for me. It was his mother. She had me look out a back window and she said to me (as a train was rushing by) “Is the no crossing sign out? I love that sign, it’s so adorable.”

There are other details in the dream, but this should suffice for the picture I am trying to paint…

I only went into the store because the one that I love goes there. Do you see how the Lord connects us when we are interceding on behalf of the ones we love? And even the ones we may not love? So that we can feel their pain and their joy and intercede for them when they may not be able to intercede for themselves?  At the end of the dream the Lord is asking me to continue to wait on Him for this promise He has given me, but that He has given me a window into the heart of the one I love so I can pray and fast for him strategically.  I know I’m the last person he would expect for a wife from the Lord…but there’s this reason I know who he is, because any work I do now  only strengthens us later and helps me grow into who He is making me to be.

This is all a part of loving your neighbor as yourself. Anything we do in the Lord for our fellow man is returned to us. Luke 6:38 says

“Give, and it will be given to you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured into your lap. For with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.”

This is a part of that! Whatever I invest into my husband now to help his growth and transformation will only benefit me in the long run. Not that I’m trying to be selfish, but because I’m being selfless and giving of my time to someone who knows me not. If we can give like that to the people we love and transform their lives, how much more the people who hate us? The people who have hurt us? What are the leaps and bounds that can be given in prayer to those who are against us?! Our enemy can become our friend in prayer! And then we too can discern the condition of their spirit and pray accordingly! We have been given a gift to have the opportunity to bear the burdens of others, just like Jesus is our Great Burden Bearer. We carry for others who don’t know how to offload their hearts cries, because we know how to offload our own and those of others to the Big Daddy.

We can only do what we have seen our Father do.

Now what if this burden bearing goes both ways? What if it’s a two way street? What if our own emotions carry back down to those we are interceding for? Is it possible? I think so. It’s why we are called to capture every thought (2 Corinthians 10:5) and put it in submission to Christ. We can’t carry it all alone. We aren’t supposed to. We should burn with the fire of God for those we love.

Lighten your load dear heart ❤

Amanda

 

We were shouting; You did not hear…

Dear Media,

Yeah. You messed up.

But the good thing is, we forgive you.

I know that most of you promise to follow the truth wherever it leads, but the problem is, the leads you were given were paid leads.  You were fed lies that you then regurgitated to the American people. The thing is there’s a large number of us who turned you off and tuned you out. We could no longer listen to the propaganda that you were feeding us, so we ventured off on our own researching things for ourselves.

But even then there was yet another group of people that you didn’t count on, doing something of unthinkable consequence.

Prophets of God praying for a miracle and aligning with His will. You see there have been prophecies that have risen up since the early 2000’s growing rapidly in number. We had been told that the Lord had risen up a Cyrus from Isaiah 45 for America. And we weren’t going to have anything less. The Lord told us to not look to you. To turn you off. To not listen to the ill reports and the things that people were saying and the things that had happened over 10 years ago. We do not stand on a foundation of fear, but rather one of Truth, and it’s the truth of our Lord that we stand on, so when He says He is for someone, we listen. We were asked to not judge him based on who he was 10 years ago because frankly…do you want to be judged for who you were 10 years ago? I don’t. We’ve all made mistakes, we’ve all been places and done and said things in our journey to find ourselves and our places.

The modern-day prophets (that many Christians don’t think exist) and intercessors have banded together and have prayed for lifetimes, years, and months, fervently for Donald J. Trump and this land called America that we love. When we saw the two candidates we saw not male and female, not Donald vs Hillary, but good vs evil. Our hearts could no longer take the genocide and bloodshed this country was allowing the enemy to use to keep us in bondage.  Don’t believe me?

Genesis 4:10 The Lord said, “What have you done? Listen! Your brother’s blood cries out to me from the ground. 11 Now you are under a curse and driven from the ground, which opened its mouth to receive your brother’s blood from your hand. 12 When you work the ground, it will no longer yield its crops for you. You will be a restless wanderer on the earth.”

And look at our food supply and our obesity epidemic. Rowe vs Wade was enacted in 1973 and a few short years later our obesity levels shot up hard. GMO’s were accepted and testing began because the ground was being difficult and facing flooding and drought.

Blood is a living entity and is a living testimony to God and viable evidence for the enemy to use against us in the Heavenly Courts.  Our tolerance has become an enabler for people to walk in sin and no feel bad about it. Our government forced the schools and other places and establishments to forsake God, when the removal of God was the very thing that snowballed us into the muck and mire we are in. You tried to feel the pulse of the American people and maybe you felt right at first, or it could have been the money you felt, but you failed to see the power of prayer.  You failed to understand that we are a country founded on God and His principles and that there are still people after His heart that He leads and directs. Wanna know what He told us?

2 Chronicles 7:14

14 if my people, who are called by my name, will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven, and I will forgive their sin and will heal their land.

Yep. You are being humbled now…but we first had to humble ourselves. We had to set aside our own wants and agenda’s and desires and get on our knees and seek the healing and restoration of this land to the way our founding fathers envisioned it.  So we chose to align with the Lord. I could give you link after link after link and fill this page with different prophets dreams and visions, to Kat Kerr, Kim Clement, Lana Vawser, Nate and Christy Johnson, well the list goes on…and on and on and on. I can tell you the stories of people being called false prophets, liars, disillusioned and religious. But it turns out, we just had our thumb on the pulse of the heartbeat of our God.

Change is coming to the 7 mountains. I decree change is coming to the 7 mountains and dear Media Mountain…get ready because you are first!

But we don’t hold this against you, we knew you had to change because we had to change first. We had to let go of our own fear so we could clearly see your fear, the fear of other Americans, the fear of some Christians…only without our own fear could we clearly see other people’s fear and see where they were operating. It’s called discernment.

A very good friend of mine made a good point today:

Fear at the feet of the enemy becomes a wall blocking your path forward.
Fear at the feet of Jesus becomes a stepping stone on your pathway forward.

“While the storm clouds gather far across the sea,
Let us swear allegiance to a land that’s free,
Let us all be grateful for a land so fair,
As we raise our voices in a solemn prayer. ”

God Bless America,
Land that I love.
Stand beside her, and guide her
Thru the night with a light from above.
From the mountains, to the prairies,
To the oceans, white with foam
God bless America, My home sweet home.

~Amanda

Eagles and Anchors

The Lord has been giving me bits and pieces of a message this last two weeks.

It started when I began seeing anchors again. Anchor on the box of mason jars, the Anchor of the Baptist Bible college on my way to work, And this little tattoo place that I walked by simply because my favorite restaurant didn’t have closer parking…

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Eagles are a symbol of the Prophets. Those who rise above the storms of this world and are anchored in the Lord. But we have a job to do…Standing in the gap. Interceding for the Nations…and we have become distracted. Distracted by all of the enemy attacks, the draining finances, the broken down cars, the screaming and defiant children (Oh BOY have I seen this one in force! And NOT just mine either!) the arguments, discontent in the workplace, threats and even whispers of violence. As we fight one issue off from one entrance, another is busting through the wall like the Kool-Aid man…so many things are screaming for more of our attention and we are relenting and taking our focus off the Lord.  Anchoring ourselves to the Lord is what we are supposed to be doing.

Because of it, there has been a breach of the enemy across the Nations.  Yesterday the Lord showed me this:

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Clearly that is a whale. I was reminded of Jonah. And before bed this song from Veggie Tales that I haven’t heard in FOREVER popped in my head as I laid my head down on the pillow, it was from the Veggie Tales Movie about Jonah.  I didn’t make the connection at first but a friend said something like “Bob the Tomato was really distracted while driving” and at 3 am I had my EUREKA! moment.  We are distracted. We are weary, tired of carrying all these things…WHY ARE WE CARRYING THEM?? It’s NOT our JOB! We were made to be ANCHORED in the Lord and praise and worship Him so that He can fight our battles for us.  I awoke for the last time this morning to get ready for the day with a song in my head which is not uncommon for me. It’s called The One I Love by Third Day. I heard it for the first time the other day and it was on my iPod and I could NOT find it at all, nor could I recall the lyrics yesterday when I tried. But this morning, I was singing it. The lyrics go like this:

Oh, you of little faith
Why do you let the wind and the waves distract you
Oh, you of little faith
Don’t you know that when you’ve fallen I’ll be there to catch you
And when all your world is gone
And you cannot sing your song
I will help you carry on
The one I love

Oh, you of little faith
Oh, how quickly and how often you have forgotten
Oh, you of little faith
Aren’t you tired of all the wars and battles you have fought in
And when all your world is gone
And you cannot sing your song
I will help you carry on
The one I love

Oh, you of little faith
Why do you let the wind and the waves distract you

Well…why do you? I knew this was a corporate message. It wasn’t JUST for me, but for ALL the One’s He Loves. And when I read Lana Vawser‘s post this morning, it was the confirmation I needed.  We are all under a LOT of stress, under attack and well…we’re all a little uncomfortable at the moment. But Jesus didn’t die to bring us comfort…

Last week in my bedroom I heard the sound of rushing waters. I paused and said, “Yes Lord, what do you wish to tell me?” I heard nothing. I laid down after praying and was just about to enter sleep when I heard in my dad’s voice my name “Amanda!” and at first I thought “aww, that’s my daddy calling me…wait. He calls me Yoda….OH MY GOSH!” and I jumped out of bed and said, “Yes Lord! I am here!” Rushing waters, rivers, license plates that say WHTWATR have all reminded me of the rushing water…in the midst of that the Anchors have been making their appearance and the Lord says:

“Oh you of little faith, why do you let the waves and wind distract you…”

He is calling us, among the chaos and the rushing waters that threaten to take us down, to be ANCHORED in HIM and we will NOT Be overtaken!

I know we have been hit from every angle, torn down, threatened and tormented. Chaos has entered our homes at every turn and as we are chasing one problem out another has entered by force from another way. I know we are tired and weary. It’s time to pick ourselves off and shut out the things that are stealing our joy- the thievery, the slander, our family members slip into trouble, the draining finances for some reason or another…well we need to rise back up. We ARE the Front Runners of the Army and as such we have been chosen as the strongest to endure the first wave which is heaviest of the attacks. We have been selected to endure the biggest hits so those behind us can grow strong, have an example to follow (Jesus is our ultimate example, but the Harvest has never been ripe like this before) and take on the next wave. We are in Harvest Time and the Nations need us. They need our hearts, our prayers and praise and so even though we are down, we are not out. It’s time to rise again, take up your swords and FIGHT!!

Front Runners, be strong in the Lord. Be anchored. Get on your knees in prayer, worship and adoration of our Adonai. Lift your hands you Eagles, stretch out your wings and FLY in the Spirit, soar on Eagles Wings my brothers and sisters so we can overcome! Lift up your voices all you Son’s and Daughters and lift His name on HIGH! DO NOT let doubt, despair, fear, shame or the things of this world capture you. Shake it off and PRAISE HIM!

Blessings,

Amanda

 

 

Present in the Past

The Lord has been highlighting the Book of Isaiah to me lately. I’ve read here and there in Isaiah, but it’s been a while since I’ve read the entirety of it…and since I’ve gotten this graduated sight and hearing and understanding of the Word…well let’s just say I needed to get to it. I’ve known for about a year that there’s a LOT about the future in this book…and the present as well.

For those that don’t know, I DO NOT believe in the “rapture” as most people do. I believe that the Bride of Christ will have another “Mass Exodus” back to the promised land and there we will reside in protection and be cared for through the Tribulation…which by God’s word is actually only the last 3.5 years, or 1260 days. The first 3.5 is the time of sorrows that Jesus speaks of in Matthew 24.

Anyway…

So Isaiah 5: 8-end

Woes and Judgments

Woe to you who add house to house        (This is a Subdivision…neighborhoods!)
    and join field to field                                    (Our property is surrounded by other property)
till no space is left                                             (Every ounce of land is occupied!)
    and you live alone in the land.                  (We don’t hardly know our neighbors!)

The Lord Almighty has declared in my hearing:

“Surely the great houses will become desolate,       (People won’t be able to afford to live)
    the fine mansions left without occupants.          (There will be a LOT of vacant properties)
10 A ten-acre vineyard will produce only a bath[a] of wine;       (Famine conditions)
    a homer[b] of seed will yield only an ephah[c] of grain.”

11 Woe to those who rise early in the morning           (Coffee for those who can’t sleep)
    to run after their drinks,
who stay up late at night                                                  (booze for those to drown their stress)
    till they are inflamed with wine.
12 They have harps and lyres at their banquets,       (They party hard but…)
    pipes and timbrels and wine,
but they have no regard for the deeds of the Lord,      (They don’t care)
    no respect for the work of his hands.
13 Therefore my people will go into exile                       (Hard times a’comin)
    for lack of understanding;
those of high rank will die of hunger                (the people will be brought low and humbled)
    and the common people will be parched with thirst.     
14 Therefore Death expands its jaws,
    opening wide its mouth;
into it will descend their nobles and masses     
    with all their brawlers and revelers.
15 So people will be brought low                    (Yep, brought low and humbled)
    and everyone humbled,
    the eyes of the arrogant humbled.
16 But the Lord Almighty will be exalted by his justice,  (People will find the Lord!)
    and the holy God will be proved holy by his righteous acts.
17 Then sheep will graze as in their own pasture;     (That is His CHURCH!!)
    lambs will feed[d] among the ruins of the rich.       (We will be provided for!!)

18 Woe to those who draw sin along with cords of deceit,  (People who try to sell false)
    and wickedness as with cart ropes,             (prosperity to those who are in desperate need)
19 to those who say, “Let God hurry;         (People who say “Jesus come quickly”)
    let him hasten his work
    so we may see it.
The plan of the Holy One of Israel—
    let it approach, let it come into view,       (Be prepared, it’s on it’s way)
    so we may know it.”

20 Woe to those who call evil good        (There will be a LOT MORE of this happening)
    and good evil,
who put darkness for light
    and light for darkness,
who put bitter for sweet
    and sweet for bitter.

21 Woe to those who are wise in their own eyes    
    and clever in their own sight.

22 Woe to those who are heroes at drinking wine  (Check your local college dorm and bars)
    and champions at mixing drinks,
23 who acquit the guilty for a bribe,
    but deny justice to the innocent.
24 Therefore, as tongues of fire lick up straw
    and as dry grass sinks down in the flames,
so their roots will decay                                        (God will bring those people down)
    and their flowers blow away like dust;
for they have rejected the law of the Lord Almighty
    and spurned the word of the Holy One of Israel.
25 Therefore the Lord’s anger burns against his people;
    his hand is raised and he strikes them down.        (When you are down, you look up)
The mountains shake,
    and the dead bodies are like refuse in the streets.    

Yet for all this, his anger is not turned away,
    his hand is still upraised.

26 He lifts up a banner for the distant nations,        
    he whistles for those at the ends of the earth.     (Come out of her my people!)
Here they come,
    swiftly and speedily!                                                 (The LORDS ARMY!!)
27 Not one of them grows tired or stumbles,
    not one slumbers or sleeps;                                 (We have been watchful!!!)
not a belt is loosened at the waist,                         (We have TRUTH!)
    not a sandal strap is broken.                                (We have PEACE!)
28 Their arrows are sharp,                                         (Armed with the WORD)
    all their bows are strung;                                     (We are READY!)
their horses’ hooves seem like flint,                    (We spread Holy FIRE wherever we tread!)
    their chariot wheels like a whirlwind.             (We are SWIFT!)
29 Their roar is like that of the lion,                      
    they roar like young lions;
they growl as they seize their prey
    and carry it off with no one to rescue.
30 In that day they will roar over it
    like the roaring of the sea.
And if one looks at the land,                                (We WILL NOT BE SHAKEN)
    there is only darkness and distress;           
    even the sun will be darkened by clouds.

We will only see with our eyes the recompense of the wicked, nothing will touch us. Though we look across the land and see darkness and distress, we will carry this LIGHT to the world and reignite the LOVE that the Father has for us.

So many read the Word of God and see condemnation. I read it and see HOPE! This is a word for the current time! The Lord is showing us that even though there is darkness and despair, that He has given us a way out! He has given us peace to spread to the nations. It looks scary…but when you have eyes to see, the fear dissembles. It falls apart like a strawman. I see love. I see the tearing down of the people so they can find their way into the arms of the Father.

I was so incredibly encouraged by this today. I hope it encourages you ❤

Amanda 

The Great Awakening

The Lord has been speaking to me more often and more clearly than ever before but it’s also…different. I’ve had prophetic dreams all my life despite not knowing or understanding until I was an adult and it has simply evolved.  I am getting words, many words that upon awaking they are strung together to form a message. The Lord has used song titles and lyrics, numbers on signs and now I seem to have branched out to giving words of wisdom and encouragement to people.

Please don’t marvel, nor applaud. I’m just a regular person like you. I work 8 hours a day, 5 days a week. I go to church on Sunday, single mom with 2 kids, still have to mow my lawn, etc. I’ve asked the “why me” and have been told “Because I love you.” So, I just thank Him for choosing me. He’s given me a title that is difficult to claim…so we just keep it between us. Titles have connotations…

The message the Lord is sending…no, BROADCASTING is coming in LOUD and CLEAR. The Lord has told me, “The rain is coming, the rain is coming, the rain is coming.” He’s said to me, “More than you dare ask or imagine, more than you dare ask or imagine, more than you dare ask or imagine.” He’s also stated that our Tent Pegs, those things that keep us rooted and grounded are being pushed in, firmly secured- so long as we remain rooted in Him. You see…I think things are about to hit the fan so-to-speak.

Here’s a word I posted a few days ago on my Facebook page:

You dip your toe in my great pond. You think you have it, you think you have achieved this great thing, but really you have nothing but a wet toe. Plunge your WHOLE BEING INTO ME and I will give you the LIFE I have to offer you. The world says a wet toe is enough, but once you take the plunge with ME, it will never be enough and you will never return to a life of mediocrity because you will be too busy being immersed in the life of more than enough that I have for you.

The Lord told me that WE are the pillars standing near the healing pools of Bethesda. His people are the ones standing by assisting people into the waters, to plunge their whole beings in. He said that the Sleeping Church is entering this Great Awakening and with it there will be a famine. People will be STARVING. They will gather in search of food, Spiritual Nourishment, gathered together on the hillside.

Matthew 14:13-21 The Message 

Supper for Five Thousand

13-14 When Jesus got the news, he slipped away by boat to an out-of-the-way place by himself. But unsuccessfully—someone saw him and the word got around. Soon a lot of people from the nearby villages walked around the lake to where he was. When he saw them coming, he was overcome with pity and healed their sick.

15 Toward evening the disciples approached him. “We’re out in the country and it’s getting late. Dismiss the people so they can go to the villages and get some supper.”

16 But Jesus said, “There is no need to dismiss them. You give them supper.”

17 “All we have are five loaves of bread and two fish,” they said.

18-21 Jesus said, “Bring them here.” Then he had the people sit on the grass. He took the five loaves and two fish, lifted his face to heaven in prayer, blessed, broke, and gave the bread to the disciples. The disciples then gave the food to the congregation. They all ate their fill. They gathered twelve baskets of leftovers. About five thousand were fed.

The Sleeping Church will awake from it’s spiritual coma ravishing hungry in search of Spiritual Nourishment and the Lord says “You feed them.”

Are we ready? Us as the “front-runners”, the sheep who have stayed close to our Fathers side and have been prepared and made ready for this time in history, are we REALLY READY for the greatest revival this world has ever seen in history? I sure hope so.

The Lord keeps telling me to “Hold ON” with images of fast horses and roller coasters because this is going to begin to move quickly. That there’s a “Flood” coming. He showed me a vision of flash flooding and He said “Don’t be afraid, stand in ME and you will be immovable.”

I’ve been also giving words. Personal words when I’ve been led to. I read them afterwards because half the time I don’t remember what they say, but they bring even ME to tears. The Lord is so tender towards us. He loves us to tenderly and, and, and…so many ways, I can see them I can feel them and the words I seek to describe fail me…I fail at describing how wonderful the Fathers embrace is because words don’t do it justice.

But my favorite word of all lately was Him telling me that I (and many of us) have been waiting for a long time, some longer than others, for that person that the Lord had for us from before time began. The person we will be in ministry with, the person that we will be joined to and go out and do the fathers work…yeah that person…that they are coming.  Some of you (Like me) know who that person is and are waiting. Some are entirely clueless (yeah…to my dismay…) but He deposited into my heart, something altogether precious as I exited the bathroom at work:

“Turn around and see (I stopped and turned to look in the mirror). You are a Diamond, hidden in plain sight.”

As I cocked my head and paused, I saw a 1 carat rhinestone sitting on the granite counter top and picked it up. I thought to myself over how many times I’d passed it by. How many times I’d not seen it because it was hidden from me…I didn’t have the eyes to see it. But the Lord told me that He would begin opening the eyes of our hearts and that those who have waited faithfully for Him to bring about their spouse would begin to see movement. That we were entering a new time, a new era of fruitfulness for His people.

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God is doing some amazing and wonderful and powerful things! Things in me, probably things in you too. Tearing out the lies that the world has deposited in our hearts, changing our mindsets and preparing us to be launched so we can feed His sheep like Jesus told Peter.

John 21:17
The third time he said to him, “Simon son of John, do you love me?” Peter was hurt because Jesus asked him the third time, “Do you love me?” He said, “Lord, you know all things; you know that I love you.” Jesus said, “Feed my sheep.”

I’m still waiting for you oh man of God. I know our time is almost here. I wish I could just walk right up to you and just spill my guts. I’ve been waiting almost a year…and still you don’t see me. You will soon. I stand firmly upon the promises of the Lord. One day, you will know my story because it is also the missing pages of your story.

A bientot,

Amanda

Open Doors

Friday, as I inked out my fears here I’d realized something happened.  There were some dreams I’d had a while back that outlined some things…some potentially hurtful things. I’d endured enough and didn’t want to face these things I was sure were going to happen. And on Thursday night when I sobbed my heart out, that something rose to the top and burst like a giant bubble, rising up from the depths to the surface where it popped.  On Thursday as I left work, I had a vision of an open door on the street and when I raised my sunglasses to get a better look, it was gone and I drove right over where this open door was. On Thursday and once again on Sunday the Lord let me find “diamonds” (cubic zirconia, but the message was the same) and told me that I was a “Diamond hidden in plain sight.”

I realized those things the Lord had shown me, were not things that were bound to happen…He was revealing to me my own heart. Since December the Lord has been revealing to me the condition of my heart in regards to myself. In my own heart, He was telling me, I thought I was a Scarlet Letter.

He was showing me a journey that had already taken place that resulted in a “raping” from the world…and the label that went along with it. I claimed that scarlet red and waited in the secret place, which was a beautiful cove of trees, smiling that something good would finally come of me. As I passed through the checkpoints, the men (men of this world) accepted the label I gave myself and agreed with it. All the while my betrothed, my beloved was out preparing himself for that moment that he and I would be together and so I waited in the secret place…and the world raped me. The fear that the Lord was showing me I had was that I was no good anymore. And that my betrothed would come and find me and be horrified…and he did, but only because it was my greatest fear. That he waited and prepared for me and here I was laying on the ground crying and dirty and raped. But then enters Lady Wisdom in all her goodness. I stood before her broken, crying and in the fashion of Glenda the Good Witch, she lifted my chin and said to me, “You were never Scarlet Red. You are Ruby Red.” My beloved standing by, pacing because of what had happened, because of what he saw. And so I walked the path again, crying the whole way there, repeating my new color to the men at the checkpoints along the way. “My secret color is Ruby Red,” and they agreed with me, “Your secret color is Ruby Red.” So I completed this downtrodden walk of shame back to the secret place where I laid down in a fetal position and sobbed near a bush. Accepting this new secret color was hard for me.  But even as I laid there, downtrodden and sad…My beloved still chose me. He came back and despite what he knew, he still picked me.

The reason these things came to the surface in me was because I was anticipating and hopeful of a meeting on Friday, that odd’s were it wasn’t going to happen…and I still had the Scarlet mindset. I was still “feeling bad” and “apologetic” and things like “I’m sorry, I’m probably not what you were expecting,” came to mind when imagining the moment when he realized who I was. Why? Why was I sorry? Because I didn’t believe in my own value. I still didn’t believe in who God said I was. And so I cried because I was worried about something actually happening in real life that would reveal my worst fears…that I wasn’t good enough.

My friend Shawn, Lord bless that woman, was angry over this dream and what I believed it to mean. I was resigned and accepting of it and said bravely, “I will go through whatever the Lord wills,” all good and martyr-like. She said, “You have already been through enough! There’s no way God would make you go through something like that!” But in reality, He did except the raping had already occurred. So as I sat there crying in my bed, hugging my pillow, I shouted. I shouted my worth…and as I laid there in my secret place, curled up in a fetal position…the dream that was a prophecy over my life had come to pass as so many before it.

And on Friday, I rose up from my bed a new woman. I had new courage. I was confident he wouldn’t show up…but I went anyway because I said I would be there. Instead I had a wonderful conversation with my very best friend, and we laughed and laughed. Something had changed in me overnight. I felt stronger and bolder and braver. And I knew that come Sunday I would stand before this man in real life…

…And invite him to coffee.  And like when you Give a Moose a Muffin, I hope he decides he would also like dinner.

~Amanda

Run and Hide

No, not like Hide-and-Go-Seek…Like a deep dark place in the woods. It should be raining. Yep. That’ll do.

I’ve had visions of open doors, white and now yellow butterflies, Elephants too. Last night the enemy tried to invade my mind spewing insecurities at me while I sobbed into my trusty feather pillow. My faithful friend who has heard and can echo my hearts cry through the years by the tear stains on her cover as she has tenderly comforted me with her pinions. I shouted “I am beautiful! I am worth being someone first choice, not their resignated option!” Shouting to myself, prophesying to my own heart and convincing myself that I AM worth it. I’m not garbage, I have a beautiful heart…I’m worth it, worthy. The Lord has made me well, has lifted me up, gifted me…Betrothed me to my Beloved, from the foundation of the earth, this was who He had for me.

But my thoughts betrayed me.
Not good enough.
Not thin enough.
No one knows me.
I’m unwanted.
I’m a charity case sitting on a thrift store shoe shelf.

My head started pounding, none of my sisters were awake to help soothe my soul, and then one messaged me. Panic. Fear. Trying to swallow the HUGE LEAP that the Lord had requested of her…quitting her job and not having anything behind it. Doubt. And on her behalf through my puffy eyes (Yep…I’m an ugly crier…) I started to push back the darkness and pray over her. I got up out of bed and started interceding on her behalf…and then my behalf and I realized…this was a Trojan Horse.

Designed to take us down from the inside by using our own fears, doubts and insecurities. As I got up this morning, I realized that there were many more of my sisters who had come under attack last night and I was glad that I had included their names in my fervent prayers in rebuking the enemies onslaught. During that prayer, I recalled the dream I had about the snake I had taken into my home. It was a sad little snake that had lost it’s fangs, was a baby and had no way to eat so I took it in to take care of it. I stood near my sister and my mom near a 3 foot brick retainer wall having a conversation when the snake grew exponentially right before my eyes though no one else seemed to notice and it advanced towards me. It’s head was the size of a LION and it was trying to eat me! Swallow me whole! And as I stood there holding it’s jaws open, struggling against it alone it suddenly grew fangs and it missed my arm narrowly but as I began to lose my grip on it’s bottom jaw, I used my knee to hold it so I could get a better grip on it’s lower jaw, when it’s fang pierced the first layer of skin on my stomach and began to pump it full of poison and it filled and looked like a blister…and it began to burn my skin inside. Somehow in the struggle I managed to tear the skin and the fluid spilled out on the floor and I woke up shouting, rebuking and saying “I crush your skull underneath my foot!”

I’m realizing that last night…I did the same. I used Genesis to curse the enemy. The struggle was with the flesh and how I feel about my body and how somehow I feel that it makes me unworthy of Love…when my very name “Amanda” means “Worthy of Love.” There was another dream about an envelope and how the envelope was stuffed FULL, it had a LOT of papers inside it and the papers represented me and that somehow my flap had been singed, but not burned…not consumed by the fire.  The dreams are one in the same. I’m so concerned about what I look like on the outside that I forget the amazingness on the inside. That the Lord made me a warrior princess, to fight unseen battles.

These scars, these stretch marks, this imperfect body does not affect who I am. It does not affect my ability to love and be loved. And beauty isn’t marked on the outside, it’s on the inside.

Proverbs 31:30 Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.

I’ve seen a beautiful person with an ugly heart and the depth of their ugliness seems to permeate the entirety of their body. But with a beautiful heart, even the outside…the pieces of me that I dislike do not compare to the beauty that I contain on the inside.

 

Thank you Father for making me, ME! I pray that my Beloved can see the same beauty.

~Amanda

Move

Little yellow leaves spin and twirl towards me and one lands on my shirt over my heart. I hear you Lord, he’s coming, the time is now. Does he even know who he is? Does he know who I am? Has he come yet to the place where he’s analyzed me like a box of old shoes that he thinks should have made it to the thrift store?  Could it be that he’s reading this…and wondering if I’m talking about him? Maybe. If he is…I’d love to have coffee with him…say 7pm Friday evening at the Starbucks down the way from church next to Albertsons.

How nerve wracking to come face to face with the man that the Lord has created just for me…and apologize that I didn’t know who I was…or I would have waited for him. Could I even have words to say…I have so many questions, so many things to share and ask…And try, in my excitement to NOT be overwhelming. What’s your favorite cartoon?! Favorite Disney movie or favorite color? Where is your favorite place to go? Adventure? Favorite candy? Or are you like me and candy is…okay…only on those rare occasions. Allergies? Are you a picky eater?? What is your FAVORITE FOOD?! What is your favorite childhood memory? Do you have any pets?  What do you know about me? Am I a mystery to you? Or were you paying attention and saw all the breadcrumbs I left you?

I saw you watching me. I should have waved. I wondered what you were thinking.  I keep waiting for the go-ahead from the Lord. But then again, yesterday was day one of the green light. Patience. We both have been waiting a very long time for each other…since 2010 for me unconsciously. Since last July consciously and since last October very consciously knowing precisely who you are. Hard. I have been praying for you daily since then and trying to stay under the radar.

This morning on my way to work, I felt an overwhelming sadness from you. Like you were frustrated, longing to belong and crying out to the Lord and I prayed.  Last night I dreamed about angelic battles with dark forces, almost like I was there watching it, it was in an area just outside the earth’s atmosphere and there were demons wrestling with angels. They were holding back answered prayers and gifts and promises to the people of God that the Lord was sending down and in my tossing and turning I also prayed, rebuked and felt like I was fighting on behalf of those angels who were fighting for us. Our gift of each other was there being held back. Shawn knew she had been praying in her sleep as well and woke up knowing that her prayers had been answered.  There’s a battle afoot!

I hope you know that you do belong. I’m fighting my own mindsets and insecurities and I keep having to remind myself that the Lord has qualified me and the very things that I think disqualify me are the things that qualify me. Same with you. It was your heart that I loved first so anything  you think about yourself, those things that you hate about yourself just don’t count because your heart is so BIG, I can’t see anything else around it. Don’t get me wrong, I know you aren’t perfect…neither am I. I’m human. There will be days that we are at odds and I will do my best to remind myself that you are NOT the enemy and that we truly do have an enemy that wants us at odds with each  other.  You have been waiting so long…your wait is over. I’ve been so worried about acting out of turn, creating Ishmaels…But the time is now. The Lord has been saying the time is now. So now I wait on Him to lead me to act. To have my Ruth moment, my Esther moment, my Abigail moment…so I can obtain the man with a heart likened unto David the Lord has been telling me about.  He really loves you.

So do I. And that’s rather radical of me to say. One might question me and say “But Amanda, you don’t really know him all the way yet. How can you say you love him?” And to that I would say, “Because the Lord has put him on my heart, shown me who he is at his core, shown me that he is ready and that the Lord made him for me, and equipped him for me. I KNOW what he’s made of because he was made by the Lord. Everything else after that…I trust the Lord in whom He picked for me, He knows what I need and what I like…He made me!”  We have a destiny together. We have a job to do and I’m excited to move forward and take hold of the Lord’s promises together. I’m excited about you.

~Amanda