So I know yesterday I mentioned some things that had happened that I was grateful for.
Today…today has me far more grateful than I can express. I will start off by saying, sometimes we wait for a miracle, sometimes we have to be ready to be the miracle. Today I woke up and started getting ready for work. It took me almost an hour to drag myself out of bed. God has been wanting me to rest lately and I’m trying, though it’s hard without letting things like the dishes or straightening up the house totally lapse. I slept for 9 hours last night…I normally end up with about 6-7. I still couldn’t wake up! I think my stress is causing me to need more sleep. Last I checked, I had about $24 in my checking account, fully expecting my car insurance of $54 to pull yesterday sending me into the red. And I was sitting at a quarter tank of gas and don’t get paid until Tuesday…things were looking and feeling rather bleak and donating plasma for the extra money…no longer an option.
So here’s how my last 24 hours went:
Co-worker bought me coffee
A different co-worker bought me lunch AND gave me $20 for gas in my car.
The co worker who bought me coffee…pulled me into a conference room at the end of the day. He said,
“So, I know you’ve been having a tough time lately. I wanted to give you something. I had some money set aside for a rainy day but it seems that you have also been having some rainy days. It’s only $300 so it won’t solve everything, but maybe it will help.”
I cried. I had prayed and told God that I needed a miracle. I was off for nearly a whole week this month. My grandma helped out but I’m still trying to play catch up on other things that it wasn’t enough. Team that up with sick days for my kids…I needed about $500 to pay the rest of my bills and have enough money for gas until Tuesday. I told him thank you and that I hadn’t been able to pay my car payment this month and the look on his face was one of surprise.
So I leave work crying and thanking God and I get to the bank. I go in, I tell the teller my miracle! I’m so excited. So she puts in my car payment for me. I then ask her how badly overdrawn am I in my checking account. Wait, I’m not? At all? But my insurance company sent me an email saying my payment had been processed…It hadn’t processed yet. So the abundance of funds left over after paying my car payment gave me enough to prevent me from overdrawing, enough money for 2 full gas tanks and leave me with a few extra bucks until Tuesday. I was so amazed and excited for what God had just done for me. The teller then said, “Well here, I have something for you,” and handed me this:
“Once you choose HOPE anything is possible.”
It was a message from God. He was letting me know that I’d finally gotten to that place of hope in surrender. I had been worrying the last week and even put myself in a depression because things were looking rather dim. I had managed through prayer and the prayers of others to reach for God’s hand and pull my head out of the muck that I felt like I’d been stuck in enough to see the Hope. To know that God would never leave me or forsake me and that ALL things work together for our good. Even the bad things. And so if He chose to not help me, maybe this was contributing to a greater good down the line…but He did choose to help me. My grandma is so gracious and is sending me an extra $200…the last $200 of the $500 that I truly needed. Couple that up with full paychecks and the hope of child support on it’s way…I think I can make it…With God, I KNOW I can. He is the Hope our hearts can rely on. He is our cornerstone, the foundation of our lives.
Cause you’re a good good Father, it’s who you are, it’s who you are…and I’m loved by you. It’s who I am, it’s who I am, it’s who I am…
I also woke up this morning with a song in my head:
It’s called Over Now by Needtobreathe and God used this song to speak to me in the car a few weeks ago. He sent me a message that was loud and clear in real time…he tied it into a couple dreams I had as well and then showed me something incredible. I’d posted about it, but I felt the need to reign it in and keep it private for now. I’ll make it public again once it’s come to fruition. But sometimes God gives us clues about future events and we just don’t need everyone to know 🙂
As for this morning, God asked me to be the miracle. A few weekends ago, our Pastor Ted told us how he saw a guy sprinting across the street and decided to follow him. He saw that the guy had missed his bus and offered him a ride. Well this morning I saw a similar scene. A woman bundled up with a few bags on her started jogging down the street, her hand waived in the air…Pastor Ted’s testimony flashed through my mind and I instinctively looked for the bus…and there it was turning the corner…and I pulled down a side street and cleaned off my passengers seat. It only took a second to know that God was calling me to action. I no longer have to be overcome emotionally to hear God. So I turn around and turn around again and pull up next to her as she’s on the phone. I asked her if she needed a ride. She was on the phone with the bus company asking about times and she looked at me and said…”let me call you back” and hung up. I said it looked as if she’d missed the bus and she confirmed that was the case. I asked where she was going…the courthouse, way downtown. She seemed shocked and surprised but I offered to take her way out of my way, on my way to work, all the way downtown. She had court and the woman on the phone was telling her the next bus time for that stop was 9:30. Her court time was 10:00am. She never would have made it. When I dropped her off she said, man, I’m thanking God for you right now. I said,
“That’s good, because He’s the one who told me to stop for you!” and we parted ways.
Sometimes we have to trust and wait for a miracle…sometimes we have to act and be the miracle.